Last Updated: Nov 13, 2012 2:45 PM
Week 9 of NFL action gave us several phenomenal fantasy football performances that were so good that owning a particular star player could’ve singlehandedly won you your weekly matchup. Particularly, there was Doug “251 Yards, 4 TDs, Muscle Hamster” Martin, Brandon “3 TD” Marshall, and Adrian “Don’t You Wish You Drafted Me Now?” Peterson.
This week, however, we got mostly bland fantasy performances from receivers and running backs and there was no one player who could’ve won you your week. That’s not to say that most stars did awful. It was all just very “blah”, leaving fantasy leagues across the country (and the one or two fantasy “American football” leagues in London) filled with mediocre scores.
Quarterbacks this week either did pretty good/very good or got injured. Those that did well basically cancelled one another out. I’ll list all SIX QBs who had three or more touchdowns here. I’ll give the top three signal callers “Champ” honors. Chances are two of the three weren’t even started in your league.
Joe Flacco: 341 pass yds, 3 pass TDs, INT, rush yd, rush TD
Matt Ryan: 411 pass yds, 3 pass TDs, INT, 2 rush yds
Andy Dalton: 199 pass yds, 4 pass TDs, -2 rush yds
Flacco: Don't expect these kinds of numbers from me every week!
Torrey Smith: Just give me the high-five, Joe.
QB HONORABLE MENTIONS
Matthew Stafford: 329 pass yds, 3 pass TDs, INT, 13 rush yds
Philip Rivers: 337 pass yds, 3 pass TDs, 2 INTs, 5 rush yds
Drew Brees: 298 pass yds, 3 pass TDs, INT, -1 rush yds
If you didn’t have any of the QBs listed above there’s a good chance you were still fine at the position since ELEVEN OTHER QUARTERBACKS had 2 touchdowns: Carson Palmer, Ryan Fitzpatrick, Sam Bradford, Tom Brady, Russell Wilson, Josh Freeman, Christian Ponder, Jake Locker, Tony Romo, Andrew Luck, and Cam Newton.
I don’t like calling players who put up bad numbers since they were injured chumps, but starting one of these four could’ve hurt you: Ben Roethlisberger, Alex Smith, Michael Vick, or Jay Cutler. (Though the only one of those four you should’ve even considered starting was Roethlisberger.)
That brings us to our Quarterback Chump of the Week! In this case someone’s getting “super chump” honors (for being an especially big fantasy chump two weeks in a row). Step right up… Eli Manning!
QB SUPER CHUMP
Eli Manning: 215 pass yds, 2 INTs, rush yd
Sanchez only had one interception.
Someone go tell Eli that he’s no longer elite so that he gets upset and becomes good again!
Welcome to the Mediocre Zone, my friends (located just east of the Twilight Zone, west of Fantasy Land, and southwest of Oz). I’d have a lot to say about running backs this week if this column were called “Guys Who Did Just Okay and Some Other Guys Who Did Okay” instead of Champ and Chumps.
Two RBs went above and beyond this week: Adrian Peterson, who’s suddenly (somehow) the best running back in football again, and Fred Jackson. Jackson was injured during the game so his fantasy owners can consider this outing a nice going away present.
Adrian Peterson: 171 rush yds, rush TD, 5 rec yds, 2-pt. conversion
Fred Jackson: 80 rush yds, 2 rush TDs, 35 rec yds, fumble lost
How you like me now?
Fourteen other RBs found the end zone at least once. Still, there was no shortage of poor performances. Ahmad Bradshaw, BenJarvus Green-Ellis, and Mikel Leshoure (fresh off his 3 TD performance a week earlier) all struggled. But they weren’t chumps for this week since three other running backs did even worse.
Reggie Bush: 21 rush yds, 8 rec yds, fumble lost (CHUMP OF THE WEEK)
Michael Turner: 15 rush yds
Matt Forte: 39 rush yds, -3 rec yds
Forte was expected to have a rough week against a stellar Texans’ defense, but 39 rush yards—really? Turner and Bush are even worse since both faced awful run defenses.
Bush’s showing was bad enough to earn him “Chump of the Week” status. It’s the most embarrassing thing to happen to him since when he dated Kim Kardashian. Or when he had to return his Heisman Trophy. One of the two.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say he's asleep.
It really was not a great week for wide receivers. Only Sidney Rice and Torrey Smith had two touchdowns. However, both had fewer than 70 yards receiving and had only 2 receptions—good games overall because of the TDs, but not champ-worthy.
Only one WR gets honors this week: Calvin Johnson. Sure, the Lions lost anyways, but Megatron had a great game.
WIDE RECEIVER CHAMP
Calvin Johnson: 207 rec yds, rec TD
"We still lost. I'm sad."
As far as chumps are concerned, these three stood out as being not only particularly bad, but also failing drastically to live up to Week 10 expectations.
WIDE RECEIVER CHUMPS
Eric Decker: 15 rec yds
Victor Cruz: 26 rec yds
Miles Austin: 32 rec yds
Just a rough day.
Andre Johnson should really be on this list too, but Charles Tillman was covering him so I’m giving him a break. (In real football and in IDP leagues, Peanut Tillman is most definitely a champ.)
A trio of tight ends each had over 100 yards receiving and two TDs. It’s rare that three TEs outscore nearly every running back and wideout.
TIGHT END CHAMPS
Jimmy Graham: 146 rec yds, 2 rec TDs (CHAMP OF THE WEEK)
Tony Gonzalez: 122 rec yds, 2 rec TDs
Greg Olsen: 102 rec yds, 2 rec TDs
I guess we can forget about Steve Smith being Cam Newton’s favorite target in Carolina. And about Jimmy Graham’s injury. And about Tony Gonzalez being really, really old.
Jimmy Graham: Half man, half dragon
So which tight ends struggled in Week 10? Well, Jason Witten and Heath Miller both disappointed (47 yards each). Still, 47 yards for a tight end isn’t that bad. Only one player is a tight end chump this week.
TIGHT END CHUMP
Vernon Davis: 30 rec yds
Pictured: Players who were in a tie
That’s four weeks in a row now that Davis has been awful. When the 49ers face the Bears next Monday night he better not be in your starting lineup.
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